Our Bodies Are Home

This weekend, I dove headlong into lilac bushes and thought about my relationship with my body. And I want to talk about it; bodies, culture, shame, lilacs, and love. I've seen a lot of concerned "quarantine weight gain" posts, and with summer sun and time outside has come folx beating themselves up for gaining weight and lamenting the "loss" of their summer bodies. Let's unpack some of it with a sprinkle of science.

Some of you know that I'm an eating disorder survivor. You know about the years I spent willfully starving, cold, and tiny. You know I found my way back to a mostly-kind relationship with my body, to loving friends and pizza and spontaneity. Our relationships with our bodies are fraught with harmful narratives that make the work of loving our bodies a battle. Did you know that, genetically speaking, your body has a comfortable/homeostatic body fat "set point"? Did you know that 30% of people considered "obese" are at no greater risk of developing heart disease/diabetes/etc. than those with "healthy" BMIs? In fact, the Body Mass Index (BMI) scale was developed for European men (I mean, who is surprised?) and doesn't account for gender-based weight differences/muscle mass. What's more, there is little evidence that "extra" fat on your body correlates with poor health if you are regularly exercising and eating a balanced diet.

This is not to say that fitness goals aren't worthy. It is to say that society is wrong about your body, and that multi-billion dollar industries train us early to hate ourselves into spending money, when nothing is wrong with our beautiful dazzling selves. Forget anyone who upholds fit bodies as a product of pure discipline and not as (partially) a role of the genetic dice, or who says skinny bodies need curves. F*ck the message that the "extra" on your waist - those vanity pounds that represent margaritas with friends and your burgeoning joy - are ugly or unworthy. No one can look at a body or your body and know about its health or habits. Forget what you've been told, be gentle with your fine selves, know that you were worthy then and worthy now and will be worthy, no matter what forever. Take up space.

Covid19 calls us to reimagine our relationship with nature. We must begin by making peace with our bodies.